Original Airdate on ABC: October 10, 2004
Written by Marc Cherry
Directed by Larry Shaw
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CAST:
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Teri Hatcher as SUSAN MEYER
Felicity Huffman as LYNETTE SCAVO
Marcia Cross as BREE VAN DE KAMP
Eva Longoria as GABRIELLE SOLIS
Brenda Strong as MARY ALICE YOUNG / NARRATOR
James Denton as MIKE DELFINO
Steven Culp as REX VAN DE KAMP
Nicolette Sheridan as EDIE BRITT
Mark Moses as PAUL YOUNG
Ricardo Antonio Chavira as CARLOS SOLIS
Cody Kasch as ZACK YOUNG
Andrea Bowen as JULIE MEYER
Jesse Metcalfe as JOHN ROWLAND
Christine Estabrook as MRS. HUBER
Joy Lauren as DANIELLE VAN DE KAMP
Zane Huett as PARKER SCAVO
Brent Kinsman as PRESTON SCAVO / PORTER SCAVO
Shane Kinsman as PRESTON SCAVO / PORTER SCAVO
Sam Lloyd as DR. ALBERT GOLDFINE
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Previously on Desperate Housewives…
(MARY ALICE takes a box off a shelf in the closet. Looking worried and distraught, she shakily
puts a revolver to her temple. We see a finger pulling the trigger, and a loud shot is heard. The
camera stays on the YOUNG family picture, as the blurred reflection of MARY ALICE is shown
in the frame of the picture falling to the ground.)
(Cut to: )
GABRIELLE: if Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we’d have known. She lives 50 feet away, for God’s sakes.
SUSAN: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must’ve been going on.
(Cut to: )
GABRIELLE: Every time I’m around that man, he tries to grab my ass!
CARLOS: I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.
(Cut to: )
JOHN: Why aren’t you happy?
GABRIELLE: Turns out I wanted all the wrong things.
(Cut to: )
GABRIELLE: What’s that?
BREE: It’s a letter, addressed to Mary Alice.
(GABRIELLE and LYNETTE read the piece of paper. They pass it to SUSAN, who reads the
note with BREE looking over her shoulder:
“I KNOW WHAT YOU DID
IT MAKES ME SICK
I’M GOING TO TELL”
SUSAN: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do?
OPEN ON: [EXT. GRAVEYARD -- DAY]
(We open on a lily flower planted on the ground of the graveyard. We pan to Mary Alice’s freshly buried grave, where we see her tombstone:
MARY ALICE YOUNG
11.18.65 – 9.26.04
Beloved Wife and Mother
There are two bunches of orangey-red roses on either side of the tombstone.)
NARRATOR: An odd thing happens when we die. Our senses vanish. Taste, touch, smell and sound become a distant memory. But our sight, ah, our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we’ve left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what’s visible to the dead can also be seen by the living, if they only take the time to look.
(Cut to: GABRIELLE, with her eyes closed, naked as she lies underwater in her bathtub, holding her breath.)
NARRATOR: Like my friend Gabrielle. I should’ve seen how unhappy she was. But I didn’t. I only saw her clothes from Paris;
(Flashback to: GABRIELLE giggling as she twirls, wearing a beautiful black dress, walking towards CARLOS, who takes her hand and pulls her towards him, kissing her.)
NARRATOR: And her platinum jewellery;
(Cut to: GABRIELLE, holding her hair back, excited as CARLOS fastens a necklace around her neck, a piece of paper, presumably the bill!, wedged in his mouth.)
NARRATOR: And her brand new diamond watch.
(Cut to: CARLOS, handing GABRIELLE an open box as he walks by, talking business on his cell phone. GABRIELLE smiles when CARLOS hands her the box, but the smile fades as CARLOS walks off, still talking on his phone.
End of Flashback. Resume to present.)
NARRATOR: Had I looked closer, I’d’ve seen that Gabrielle was a drowning woman, desperately in search of a life raft. Luckily for her, she found one.
(GABRIELLE sits up, smiling as she leans towards JOHN as they kiss.)
NARRATOR: Of course, Gabrielle only saw her young gardener as a way to infuse her life with a little excitement. But now, she was about to discover just how exciting her life could get.
(Cut to: CARLOS in his car, pulling in the driveway. We flash between scenes of GABRIELLE kissing JOHN, giggling as CARLOS gets out, holding a briefcase in his hand. As he slams the door, GABRIELLE stops, hearing a noise. She peeks out the window and sees CARLOS walking along the path towards the house.)
GABRIELLE: Damn it! (grabs JOHN’s arm, pulling him out of the bathroom) Come on.
JOHN: Whoa!
(GABRIELLE and JOHN hurry down the stairs, slipping and sliding as they go.)
GABRIELLE: Come on, come on, hurry! Let’s go, let’s go!
(They run into the living room. GABRIELLE grabs the strewn clothes on the floor, shoving them at JOHN.)
JOHN: Where’re the rest of my clothes?
(CARLOS stops at the bottom of the path, opening the letterbox to get the mail.)
GABRIELLE: I’ll find them, just get out!
JOHN: Where?
(GABRIELLE looks around, sees the back windows facing the side garden. She points at the window.)
GABRIELLE: Out the window.
JOHN: What?
GABRIELLE: Go, go!
(As JOHN tries to get out the window, GABRIELLE looks at the door, panicked as we cut to CARLOS walking up the steps of the front porch. GABRIELLE pushes JOHN out the window, grabbing his towel as she wraps her hair in the towel JOHN was using. She smiles at CARLOS who walks in.)
GABRIELLE: Hi honey, you’re home early!
CARLOS: My meeting got cancelled. (looks at GABRIELLE as he puts down his things on the table.) You just took a shower this morning.
GABRIELLE: I, uh, I just finished a workout.
(GABRIELLE’s smile fades as she sees JOHN’s jeans in the corner of the couch, luckily hidden from CARLOS’ view. She walks towards CARLOS, covering the jeans with a cushion.)
CARLOS: Mmm. Where’s John?
GABRIELLE: John?
CARLOS: Yeah. That’s his truck out front.
(GABRIELLE is speechless, her mouth moving, but no sound coming out of her mouth.)
NARRATOR: Gabrielle was panicked. She knew if her husband discovered her secret, she would feel the full force of his wrath.
JOHN: Hey Mr. Solis.
(We pan to the open front window, where JOHN is seen, trimming the hedge with his shears. He is wearing his flannel shirt.)
CARLOS: Hey, John, did you take care of that ficus yet?
JOHN: I’ll get to it as soon as I’m done here.
CARLOS: Alright. We need to talk about the hedges later.
(JOHN flashes GABRIELLE a brief, shy smile as GABRIELLE breathes a sigh of relief.)
NARRATOR: But she was quickly reminded that what Carlos couldn’t see, couldn’t hurt her.
JOHN: Yeah, sure, no problem.
(The camera pans to the outside view, where we see JOHN, wearing only his flannel shirt and nothing else, as he stands on a stepladder, pretending to trim the hedges. Hehe. Yummy.)
Opening Credits
[OPEN ON: INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN -- NIGHT]
(We open to look out the kitchen window, where we see the darkened YOUNG house opposite
SUSAN’s house. The camera pans to show LYNETTE sitting on the kitchen counter, rubbing her neck with one hand. We then see BREE holding a dishcloth and wiping her hands, her face sombre, as GABRIELLE holds a glass of red wine in her hands. SUSAN is sitting at the table. They are all looking at the kitchen table, where, in front of SUSAN, lays the mysterious warning letter found in MARY ALICE’s belongings. The camera cuts to show a face shot of SUSAN, GABRIELLE, BREE, then LYNETTE. They all look solemn.)
NARRATOR: The peaceful façade of Wisteria Lane had recently been shattered. First by my suicide, and then by the discovery of a note among my belongings that suggested a suspicious reason for my desperate act. My friends gathered to discuss its implications
SUSAN: (sighs) I think we should give it to Paul.
GABRIELLE: He’s still mourning, Susan, he’ll probably freak out.
SUSAN: It doesn’t matter, she was his wife. He deserves to have all the facts.
BREE: Well, we could do it gently. We could tell him about it over coffee and pastry. (hands LYNETTE a cup of tea.)
LYNETTE: (sips the tea) That would be fun. Paul, we have proof your wife killed herself over some deep dark secret. Another “?”?
GABRIELLE: We could always call the police.
LYNETTE: Maybe it’s just some sort of sick joke.
BREE: Well if it was a joke, it was in very poor taste.
SUSAN: No, this was serious, I know it was. We gotta find out what was going on.
LYNETTE: (puts the cup of tea down on the counter and slides off to lean against the counter) Let’s say we do. There’s a chance we’re not gonna like what we find.
SUSAN: Well, isn’t it worse to be in the dark, imagining she did all these horrible things?
BREE: It’s the usual question, isn’t it? (SUSAN looks up at BREE.) How much do we really wanna know about our neighbours?
(SUSAN looks at GABRIELLE, who looks down at the letter. The camera pans to show the threatening letter.)
[FADE TO: EXT. YOUNG HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(ZACH stands at the bottom of the emptied pool, looking down into a deep, dark hole that PAUL dug up. He looks back at the dark house, where we cut to PAUL staggering into the garage, carrying a large, heavy chest. It looks like it hasn’t been opened for a long time.)
NARRATOR: My friends were right to be concerned. They knew that every family has its secrets. And as my son and husband could’ve told them, you need to think carefully before digging them up.
[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(We see our four housewives walking towards the gate. They say their farewells, as SUSAN walks back into her house. LYNETTE walks along the left path, GABRIELLE walks along the right path and BREE crosses the street – all in four different directions.)
NARRATOR: After talking for hours, my friends still hadn’t agreed on what to do with the note. So, they decided to talk about it in the morning after a good night’s rest. But no one could fall asleep that night. They each kept thinking of my suicide, and how terribly alone I must’ve felt. You see, lonely was something my friend’s understood all too well.
(Cut to: SUSAN, lying awake in her bed as she sighs.)
(Pan to: GABRIELLE, lying alone in her bed, CARLOS’ side empty. She looks frustrated, angry and sad.)
(Pan to: LYNETTE, who turns her head to the empty side of the bed. Presumably TOM is on another one of his business trips.)
(Pan to: BREE, who still looks very prim and proper lying in her bed with a proper white, frilly, lacy nightgown. But, it’s sleeveless. Sassy ;). BREE sighs as she looks sideways at the empty side of the bed. We cut to BREE walking down the stairs to the living room, tying the cord of her dressing gown. She stops at the foot of the makeshift bed where REX is lying, back towards the camera. She “ahem”s.)
REX: (turns around) Its okay, I’m up
BREE: (smiles) Good. I have a question for you.
REX: (rolls his eyes, and gets up, sitting next to BREE on the side of the bed.) Okay.
BREE: Do you remember when you proposed?
REX: For god’s sake.
BREE: We sat on Skyline Drive and drank a bottle of apple wine. And when we finished it, you turned to me and you said, If you marry me, Bree Mason, I promise to love you for the rest of my life. And even though I was engaged to Ty Grant, and even though my father didn’t like you, I said yes.
REX: That was a long time ago.
BREE: You’re gonna cancel the meeting with that divorce lawyer, and we’re gonna find ourselves a marriage counsellor.
REX: Bree, I…
BREE: (looks crestfallen) You promised.
REX: Alright.
BREE: (smiles) Good, I’m gonna go make myself some, uh, warm milk. Would you like something to drink?
REX: Anything but apple wine.
[CUT TO: INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(SUSAN stands at the kitchen counter, filling a glass filled with water. She takes a sip as she looks out the window. She sees MIKE walking his dog across the road, sighing.)
NARRATOR: Susan awoke that night alone and parched. And as she gazed out her window, she saw the tall drink of water she needed to quench her thirst.
JULIE: Dear Diary, Mike doesn’t even know I’m alive.
SUSAN: Shut up.
JULIE: If you wanna date him, you’re gonna have to ask him out.
SUSAN: I keep hoping he’ll ask me out.
JULIE: How’s that going?
SUSAN: Shouldn’t you be making brownies for your nerdy friends?
JULIE: I can’t find the measuring cup. Have you seen it?
SUSAN: The measuring cup? (flashbacks to dropping the measuring cup in the living room of the BRITT house.)
JULIE: Yeah.
SUSAN: Hm. (flashbacks to SUSAN yelping, the living room on fire, then to the firefighters trying to save the burning house.) Uh, well it’s gotta be here somewhere. Just keep looking.
[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - BEDROOM -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(The bedroom door opens, and CARLOS walks in. He goes to the walk-in closet and takes off his suit jacket. GABRIELLE’s eyes are closed.)
CARLOS: I know you’re awake.
GABRIELLE: I know you’re a jerk.
CARLOS: Dinner with Tanaka ran long, I’m sorry.
GABRIELLE: (sits up) You know, Carlos, I didn’t marry you so I could have dinner by myself 6 nights a week. You know how bored I was today? I came this close to actually cleaning the house.
CARLOS: Don’t be that way. I got you a gift.
GABRIELLE: Nope. No, no, no, no. you’re not gonna buy your way outta this one.
CARLOS: It’s a good gift. (lays on the bed next to her, and tosses the jewellery box next to GABRIELLE.)
GABRIELLE: Is that white gold?
CARLOS: Yeah. Put it on. (kisses GABRIELLE’s shoulder) And then make love to me.
GABRIELLE: I’m not in the mood. But, we could stay up and talk.
CARLOS: (laughs and gets up, walking to the table at the end of the bed) When a man buys a woman expensive jewellery, there are many things he may want in return. For future reference, conversation ain’t one of ‘em.
(GABRIELLE throws the box at him, pissing off. Jerk.)
CARLOS: Hey, that was a joke.
GABRIELLE: Yeah, right. (throws the bedcovers back and gets up)
CARLOS: (catches hold of her by her arms) What the hell’s wrong with you?
GABRIELLE: Let go of me.
CARLOS: You’ve been acting like a nightmare for a month. What’s wrong?
GABRIELLE: Stop.
CARLOS: I can’t fix it unless you tell me.
GABRIELLE: (throws her arms free, and sits back on the bed, sighing) It’s not exciting anymore, Carlos.
CARLOS: (sighs, sits on the bed next to her) So what am I supposed to do?
GABRIELLE: I don’t know. Be the way you used to be, surprise me, take my breath away.
CARLOS: (sighs) Okay. Okay.
[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- DAY]
(The front door opens, and SUSAN walks out, holding a bag of rubbish. She looks like she literally just rolled out of bed. She stifles a yawn as she opens the rubbish bin at the kerb, stuffing the plastic rubbish bag into it. We see MIKE a little distance away behind her, walking his dog again. He turns at the sound of SUSAN dumping the rubbish.)
MIKE: Hey Susan.
SUSAN: (stops short, eyes wide, not turning around) Mike!
MIKE: What’s wrong?
SUSAN: I didn’t realize anyone was gonna be out here, I just sorta rolled outta bed.
MIKE: I’m sure you look fine.
SUSAN: Oooh. (fixes herself, then turns around, smiling.)
MIKE: (pulls Bongo back as the dog starts barking at SUSAN, who looks startled) Ooh, Bongo, Bongo! Shh.. Sorry, uh, he scares easy.
SUSAN: No, it’s fine, I get it.
MIKE: I didn’t mean to disturb you. I’ll see you later. (turns around to go)
SUSAN: D—do you wanna have dinner with me?
MIKE: (turns back towards SUSAN) Just the two of us?
SUSAN: Heh, well, and Julie. Uh, it’s a thing we do when somebody new moves into the neighbourhood, we invite them over for a home-cooked meal. Sort of a tradition.
MIKE: You said you were a lousy cook.
SUSAN: Well. I order takeout.
MIKE: Oh, you invite them over for a home-cooked meal and you order takeout.
SUSAN: Yeah, it’s sort of a new tradition. I’m working out the kinks.
MIKE: (chuckles) I’ll tell you what. How ‘bout I cook? And you guys come over to my place.
SUSAN: Oh. Great.
MIKE: Friday night at six?
SUSAN: I’ll be there.
MIKE: Alright.
SUSAN: (laughs, bending down towards Bongo) Bye, Bongo.
(Bongo barks at SUSAN, who jumps back, laughing tentatively. SUSAN runs back into the house, excited. JULIE watches her smiling at her mother’s obvious excitement. SUSAN bursts into the kitchen door.)
SUSAN: Julie? Mike Delfino just invited us to dinner Friday night.
JULIE: He did? Cool.
SUSAN: But only I’m going. Because you’re gonna come down with something semi-serious that requires bed-rest and fluids. (runs up the stairs as she squeals)
[CUT TO: EXT. BRITT HOUSE -- DAY]
(EDIE and MRS. HUBER are sifting through the burnt-out shell of the house.)
NARRATOR: Julie was glad Susan was rekindling her love life. Of course, she was unaware of her mother’s recent track record with fire.
EDIE: It’s all gone. Everything my ex-husband’s worked for all those years. Gone.
MRS HUBER: Don’t worry about clothing, I already started a collection from people in the neighbourhood.
EDIE: (picks up a little burnt pot, and puts it in a bucket) What? I don’t wanna wear other people’s old crap.
MRS HUBER: Edie, you can be homeless or you can be ungracious. You really can’t afford to be both.
EDIE: (picks up a semi-burnt pink bra, and sighs) That reminds me. My insurance cheque still hasn’t come yet. Can I stay with you for a few more weeks?
MRS HUBER: Of course. What kind of Christian would I be if I denied shelter to a friend in need? (spots SUSAN’s burnt measuring cup on the ground)Oh look, here’s something we can salvage, your measuring cup. We can just scrape off the burnt part and it’ll look good as new.
EDIE: That’s not my cup. Mine was plastic.
MRS HUBER: Well, how did it get in here?
EDIE: I don’t know. Who cares? Now would you put that down and start looking for jewellery? (MRS. HUBER holds onto the burnt glass measuring cup, looking suspicious.)
[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE’S OFFICE -- DAY]
NARRATOR: Doctor Albert Goldfine was the most accomplished marriage counsellor in the city. He had dealt with problems ranging from substance abuse, to infidelity, to domestic violence. Yes, Dr. Goldfine thought he had seen it all. And then, he met the Van De Kamp’s.
(DR. GOLDFINE is sitting at his desk, writing when he hears a knock at his office door. He walks over to open it. BREE and REX are standing there. BREE is looking sparkly and happy as usual, while REX looks on, incredulously exasperated.)
BREE: Hi, I’m Bree, and this is my husband Rex. And I brought you some homemade pot pourri. (She hands him a packet of pot pourri as she walks past him into the office.)
REX: (pats DR. GOLDFINE on the shoulder) The answer is yes, you’re about to make a fortune off us.
(DR. GOLDFINE looks ambushed. Teehee.)
[CUT TO: INT. SCAVO CAR -- DAY]
LYNETTE: Boys, guys, I’m begging you, sit in your seats. I’m not gonna tell you again! Buckle up! I mean it, so help me, I… (A police motorcycle drives up behind her, siren sounding) Oh .. crap! (She stops the car.)
OFFICER: (the policeman gets off his bike and walks to LYNETTE’s window) License and registration please. (accepts the documents from LYNETTE) Ma’am, you know why I pulled you over?
LYNETTE: I have a theory.
OFFICER: Your kids are jumping up and down; they should be sitting, wearing a seatbelt.
LYNETTE: I yelled at them. They never listen to me, it’s very frustrating.
OFFICER: Well, you’re gonna hafta find a way to control them. After all, that’s your job. (Walks off back to his motorbike)
NARRATOR: Though he’d been a policeman for 6 years, Officer Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a woman how to raise her children.
(LYNETTE sits with her hands on the wheel of her car, looking pissed.)
LYNETTE: (gets out of her car, slamming the door) You saying I’m a bad mother?
OFFICER: Ma’am, you need to get back in your car please.
LYNETTE: (slowly walks towards the policeman) I have no help, my husband’s always away on business.
OFFICER: I’m gonna hafta ask you to step back now. (slowly moves his hands towards his weapon)
LYNETTE: My babysitter joined the witness relocation program. I haven’t slept through the night in 6 years.
OFFICER: Ma’am..?
LYNETTE: (gets right in the policeman’s face) And for you to stand there, and judge me.
OFFICER: Okay. I’m not gonna give you a ticket. I’m just gonna let you off with a warning.
LYNETTE: I accept your apology. (takes her license and registration from his hands and gets back in her car.)
OFFICER: Buckle up!
[CUT TO: EXT. ROWLAND HOUSE -- DAY]
(We see someone (JOHN’s mum) come out the front door, get in their car and drive off. As soon as the car drives down the road, a car door opens, and a pair of leopard-print high-heels steps out of the car. It’s GABRIELLE, who looks around, a little shiftily. She walks – struts – across the street. A doorbell is hear, and JOHN opens the door to GABRIELLE.)
JOHN: (smiles) Mrs. Solis!
GABRIELLE: Hello Jonathan.
(Cut to: JOHN and GABRIELLE walk into his room. JOHN closes the door behind them.)
JOHN: Well, this is my room. Sorry about the mess.
GABRIELLE: Oh, well, don’t... (hesitates as she sees his messy room) …worry about it.
JOHN: You just missed my mom. On Friday she coaches my little sister’s soccer team.
GABRIELLE: (takes a half-eaten sandwich on a plate off JOHN’s bed, putting it on his desk) Oh yes, I heard that. Uh, John, we need to talk about what happened the other day.
JOHN: Mr. Solis isn’t starting to catch on, is he?
GABRIELLE: (sits on the edge of his bed) No, no, he doesn’t have a clue, God love him. It’s just, I was thinking, that when you come over to garden, you might actually have to garden.
JOHN: Great, you’re breaking up with me. In my own bedroom.
GABRIELLE: No, no, no, I’m not dumping you. Lately, you’ve been the only thing keeping me going. It’s just, we can’t do it at my house anymore.
JOHN: Oh, so then, where do you wanna do it?
GABRIELLE: Well, uh, what time does your mom get back from soccer practice?
JOHN: (smiles a little shyly) Mrs. Solis.
GABRIELLE: You better hurry, we don’t have a lot of time.
(JOHN rips his shirt off as he walks over to GABRIELLE, laying her down on the bed as he kisses her neck. GABRIELLE catches sight of a picture of a younger JOHN playing baseball next to the bed. She flips the photo down out of sight, then smiles.)
[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE’S OFFICE -- DAY]
(The camera opens on a recording voice-recorder as we hear BREE talking in the Van De Kamp’s therapy session.)
BREE: And so, there’s just the four of us. My oldest son Andrew is 16, Danielle is 15, and…(looks down as she reaches into her purse)
DR GOLDFINE: (hastily) I don’t need to see pictures. Bree, you’ve spent most of the hour engaging in small talk.
BREE: (smiles serenely) Oh, have I?
(REX flashes BREE a sideways glance.)
DR GOLDFINE: Yes. Rex has been very vocal about his issues. Don’t you want to discuss your feelings about your marriage?
BREE: (shifts uncomfortably, smoothing her hair) Um, Doc…mm…
REX: This is the thing you need to know about Bree. She doesn’t like to talk about her feelings. To be honest, it’s hard to know if she has any. (BREE looks at REX incredulously.) Does she feel anger, rage, ecstasy? Who knows? She’s always… pleasant. And I can’t tell you how annoying that is. (BREE catches sight of a loose button on DR. GOLDFINE’s jacket. She stares at it, lost in thought as REX’s words start sounding distorted as she loses concentration in the conversation) Whatever she feels is so far below the surface that.. that noone can see… she uses all those domestic things..
(BREE keeps staring at DR. GOLDFINE fiddling with his loose button as she unconsciously reaches down into her bag, taking out a handy sewing kit.)
DR GOLDFINE: Bree? Bree.
BREE: What? I-I’m sorry.
DR GOLDFINE: Would you like to respond to what Rex just said?
BREE: Oh, I..(looks lost for words)
DR GOLDFINE: Is there some truth there? Do you use housework as a way to disengage emotionally?
BREE: Of course not. (drops the sewing kit back in her bag quickly. Teehee. Gotta love the woman.)
[CUT TO: INT. ROWLAND HOUSE - JOHN’S BEDROOM -- DAY --- LATER]
(JOHN is laying back in his bed, wearing just his boxers, sighing with contentment. GABRIELLE is sitting at the edge of his bed, putting her earrings back on.)
JOHN: This is great. I got tons of homework tonight. It’s so much easier to concentrate after sex.
GABRIELLE: I’m glad I could help. Education is very important.
JOHN: Oh, I got something for you. I was gonna give it to you the next time I mowed your lawn, but since you’re here… (gets a single rose from his shelf.)
GABRIELLE: Oh, it’s a rose.
JOHN: It’s not just any rose. Look at all the petals. There’s no flaws, it’s perfect.
GABRIELLE: Oh, John.
JOHN: Just like you.
NARRATOR: The truth hit her like a thunderbolt.
JOHN: I spent days looking for this one. Finally found it.
NARRATOR: For John, this was no longer a meaningless little affair. Gabrielle could now clearly see he was falling in love with her.
GABRIELLE: (smiles at him) It’s just beautiful. I, uh, I gotta go.
JOHN: Bye..
[CUT TO: EXT. DELFINO HOUSE -- DAY --- LATER]
(MIKE is getting bags of groceries out of his truck, nudging the door shut. SUSAN runs across his lawn towards him.)
SUSAN: Hey you. What’re we having?(takes a bag of groceries from him)
MIKE: I talked to Julie, thanks, and she suggested rib-eye steaks. She said it’s your favourite.
SUSAN: Oh yeah, I love my steak.
(A silver sportscar, maybe Porsche?, drives up and stops at the bottom of MIKE’s driveway. EDIE toots the horn.)
EDIE: Hi Mike. Susan.
(MIKE walks back down the driveway towards the car.)
SUSAN: Edie. (sighs as she walks down to join MIKE.)
MIKE: Hey, I’m sorry about your house. How you holding up?
EDIE: Alright, I guess. (opens the car door and steps out.) Oh, is somebody having a party?
MIKE: No, Susan’s just throwing me one of her traditional welcome-to-the-neighbourhood dinners. Only I’m cooking. And having it at my house.
EDIE: (laughs) Traditional. Hm. I didn’t get one.
SUSAN: Oh, it’s sort of a new tradition.
MIKE: Well it won’t be anything fancy, just a little home cooking.
EDIE: Mmm, that sounds so good.
NARRATOR: Susan suddenly had an awful feeling in the pit of her stomach.
EDIE: I’ve been having nothing but fast food lately. (rummages through MIKE’s grocery bags, taking out a grape and eating it seductively, staring at MIKE.)
NARRATOR: As if she was watching an accident in slow motion. She knew it would happen, but was powerless to stop it.
(MIKE turns around to look at SUSAN, cocking his head as if to ask if it’s okay.)
SUSAN: Edie, would you like to join us for dinner?
EDIE: Oh that’s so sweet. No, I don’t wanna intrude. Three’s a crowd.
MIKE: No, it’s not like that. I mean, Susan’s bringing Julie.
SUSAN: It’s not like that. The more the merrier.
EDIE: Well, this’ll be fun.
MIKE: Alright. Tomorrow night. We’ll eat at six.
EDIE: Great. Oh, and Susan.
SUSAN: Yeah.
EDIE: This’ll make up for the dinner that you never threw me.
SUSAN: Right. (laughs feebly)
EDIE: Ta!
MIKE: I haven’t, ah, told her we were having steak. She’s not like a vegetarian, is she?
SUSAN: Oh, no, no. No, Edie’s definitely a carnivore.
(Pan to: SCAVO HOUSE, where MRS. HUBER is standing on the porch. She’s peering out onto the road, watching EDIE’s silver car drive off as EDIE toots the horn again. LYNETTE comes out of the front door with a box of clothing.)
LYNETTE: Here’s, uh, here’s what I pulled for Edie. I should warn you, most of the clothes in there aren’t that stylish.
MRS HUBER: Oh don’t worry about it, Edie’s a beggar now, which means she can’t be a chooser. (sorts through the box of clothing, then pulls out a yellow-and-orange shirt, giving it back to LYNETTE) Of course we don’t have to add salt to the wound.
LYNETTE: Listen, I was just getting dinner ready.
MRS HUBER: Say no more. I’ll get out of your hair.
LYNETTE: No, no.
MRS HUBER: By the way, was that you I saw getting pulled over by a policeman?
LYNETTE: Yeah, the boys were acting up in the car, I couldn’t get them to sit down..
MRS HUBER: Young boys can be so wilful.
LYNETTE: I try everything. I scream, I threaten, I reason, I beg, nothing works. I don’t know if it’s because they’re too young and they don’t understand, or if they’re just getting some perverse joy out of testing me! (looks frazzled, rubbing her eyes with her fingers)
MRS HUBER: My mother used to have the worst time with me in the car, so one time when I was acting up, she stopped and left me on the side of the road, and she drove off.
LYNETTE: You’re kidding.
MRS HUBER: Oh, she came back immediately. But I never misbehaved in the car again. You should try that.
LYNETTE: Mrs. Huber, I could never leave my kids by the side of the road.
MRS HUBER: When it comes to discipline, sometimes you must be creative. My mother knew that. Smart lady. Of course she’s in a home now, and her mind has just turned to mush.
LYNETTE: Well, like I said, I should go back and get dinner ready.
MRS HUBER: Oh right. Well. Goodbye.
LYNETTE: Goodbye.
(Pan to: MRS. HUBER walking across the road as she passes by SUSAN, stopping her.)
MRS HUBER: Susan! Have you been able to find old clothes for Edie? She has nothing to wear.
SUSAN: I thought that was a look she was going for.
MRS HUBER: Oh Susan. Edie may be trash, but she’s still a human being.
(MRS. HUBER walks down the road as the camera stops on ZACH standing in the front garden of the YOUNG house, watering the lawn. SUSAN stops, looking at ZACH as she takes the mysterious letter out of her pocket and looks at it.)
SUSAN: Zach? Is your dad home? I need to talk to him.
(ZACH opens the YOUNG’s garage door, where PAUL is inside, duct-taping the mysterious box shut.)
SUSAN: Hey Paul.
PAUL: Hey. (continues securing the box)
SUSAN: I hope I’m not interrupting.
PAUL: Actually I was getting ready to go somewhere.
SUSAN: I just wanted to come by and say hello, you know, see how you guys are doing.
PAUL: We’re trying to move on. It’s been pretty tough.
SUSAN: I can only imagine. Not knowing why Mary Alice…
PAUL: Why what? (lifts the box off the table, almost dropping it)
SUSAN: Why she did it. Oh! Let me help you.
PAUL: I got it, I’ve got it. (pulls the box away from SUSAN as he heaves it into the open trunk of his car. He shuts the trunk, then goes to the front of the car, opening the driver’s-seat door.)
SUSAN: Sorry if I upset you.
PAUL: Can I be frank?
SUSAN: Of course.
PAUL: I don’t care what her reasons were. Maybe she was depressed, maybe she was bored. She abandoned her husband and her son. And I’ll never forgive her.
(PAUL gets in the car and shuts the door. He drives off, as SUSAN stands in the driveway, watching him drive away.)
NARRATOR: As I watched Susan, I couldn’t help feeling sorry for her. She wanted so much to know why I did it.
[CUT TO: EXT. WILDERNESS -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(PAUL moves the heavy box out of his car trunk, and dumps it into a river. He watches as it floats for a few seconds, then slowly sinks to the dark depths.)
NARRATOR: Why I killed myself. It’s not enough to want the truth. You must know where to look for it. And the truth is elusive, because it knows where to hide.
[CUT TO: INT. MEYER HOUSE -- AFTERNOON]
(JULIE is in the kitchen. She opens the back door to MRS. HUBER.)
MRS HUBER: Hello Julie, I talked to your mom about donating some clothes for Edie.
JULIE: She’s at Mrs. Van De Kamp’s, but I’ll see if she left some stuff upstairs.
(JULIE runs up the back stairs. MRS. HUBER walks into the kitchen, sauntering over to peer into the grocery bags. She takes out a perfume spray, spraying some on her neck. She coughs as she puts it back in the bag, then takes out… (gasp) a new glass measuring cup. She looks up as a revelation hits her. JULIE comes back down the stairs, stopping at the landing as she sees MRS. HUBER holding the measuring cup.)
MRS HUBER: Oh Julie. I-I was just, um, just admiring your new measuring cup.
JULIE: Yeah, we lost ours. (takes the measuring cup back)
MRS. HUBER: Really.
JULIE: So I couldn’t find the clothes, I’m sorry.
MRS HUBER: That’s okay.
JULIE: If you want me to keep looking.
MRS HUBER: No, you’ve done more than enough. Truly.
(MRS. HUBER walks out the back door. JULIE stands there, looking like she’s thinking “you weird old lady.” Teehee.)
[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE’S OFFICE -- DAY]
(BREE is sitting in the waiting room of DR. GOLDFINE’s office, turning as he opens the door of his office.)
DR GOLDFINE: Bree, Rex just called, he won’t be able to meet you here today. Apparently, there was an emergency at the hospital.
BREE: Oh. Well, I wish he had called me. (stands up, slinging her bag onto her shoulder as she walks towards DR. GOLDFINE)
DR GOLDFINE: He suggested maybe you’d like to meet with me by yourself? You’ve been very quiet in our joint sessions.
BREE: (again notices DR. GOLDFINE’s loose button, distracted) What? Oh, oh, oh no, thank you. I have some things that I, I need to do today.
DR GOLDFINE: Are you sure?
BREE: Uh, yeah, I’m sure.
DR GOLDFINE: Okay. (shuts his office door.)
(BREE walks out of the office… then turns around decidedly, goes back and knocks on DR. GOLDFINE’s office, walking in. DR. GOLDFINE looks up.)
BREE: Dr. Goldfine. There is something you can do for me.
DR GOLDFINE: What’s that?
BREE: Take off your coat. (shuts the office door)
(DR. GOLDFINE looks startled. Hee.)
[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- DAY]
(GABRIELLE and SUSAN walk in the front door, holding many, many shopping bags.)
GABRIELLE: So now you’re taking Julie on your dinner date with Mike?
SUSAN: Yeah, well, if Edie’s gonna be there, I’m gonna need emotional support.
GABRIELLE: I can’t believe she wormed her way in. How did you let her do that?
SUSAN: I don’t know, I was gonna take her out at the knees, but it all happened so fast.
GABRIELLE: Well, you know what you need to do. You need to get there early, spend a little time with Mike before little barracuda gets there.
SUSAN: That’s a good idea. Edie will get there at 5:45, which means her breasts will arrive at 5:30, so I should shoot for 5.
GABRIELLE: Attagirl. I’m just gonna take these upstairs.
SUSAN: I’m gonna keep my one little bag and go home.
GABRIELLE: Okay.
SUSAN: That is a beautiful rose. Where did you get it? (leans down to smell the rose)
GABRIELLE: Oh, John gave it to me. (stops halfway up the stairs, cringing as she says it)
SUSAN: John? Your gardener, he gave you a rose?
GABRIELLE: Yes, I am having some new bushes planted outside, and he gave me that as a colour palette.
SUSAN: Oh. Okay. Sure is beautiful, isn’t it? (turns around and walks out the front door)
GABRIELLE: Yes it is.
[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE’S OFFICE -- DAY --- LATER]
(DR. GOLDFINE is leaning against his desk, watching as BREE sews his button back on.)
DR GOLDFINE: I’m sure Freud would not approve of this.
BREE: Oh, who cares what he thinks? I took psychology in college, we learned all about Freud. A miserable human being.
DR GOLDFINE: What makes you say that?
BREE: Well, think about it. He grew up in the late 1800’s, there were no appliances back then. His mother had to do everything by hand, just backbreaking work from sunup to sundown. Not to mention the countless other sacrifices she probably had to make to take care of her family. And what does he do? He grows up and becomes famous, peddling a theory that the problems of most adults can be traced back to something awful their mother has done. (sighs) She must have felt so betrayed. He saw how hard she worked; he saw what she did for him. Did he even ever think to say, thank you? I doubt it. (smiles at DR. GOLDFINE, helping him put his jacket back on.) There you go.
DR GOLDFINE: Just so you know, many of Freud’s theories have been discredited.
BREE: Good. (smiles, turns to leave)
[CUT TO: INT. SCAVO CAR -- DAY]
(LYNETTE is driving, and again, the SCAVO kids are misbehaving. Screaming, yelling, standing up, moving around. Ugh. Devil-kids.)
LYNETTE: Boys, I am not gonna tell you again, sit. I mean it, I am serious. You guys are gonna be in so much trouble if you don’t sit back in those seats.
(The three kids suddenly go quiet, whispering in each other’s ears, giggling maliciously, peering at LYNETTE, cackling. LYNETTE looks back in the mirror, seeing them mocking her.)
NARRATOR: For the first time, Lynette could see this was not the innocent play of children. She was being challenged. So she decided it was time to get creative.
(LYNETTE stops the car by the side of the road. She marches the kids out of the car.)
LYNETTE: Out. Can’t behave, you heard me, can’t ride. You, out. Move it.
(LYNETTE gets back in the car, looks at the three noisy kids on the sidewalk and drives off. The kids stand there, watching her drive off.)
SCAVO KIDS: Where she’s going? I don’t know. Where’s she going?
(LYNETTE pulls her car into a random driveway.)
LYNETTE: Okay. (to the baby) Mommy’s a genius! Five, six, alright. (spots the empty sidewalk where she left her kids) Uh. Oh! Uhh. I’ll be right back, Mommy’ll be right back.
(LYNETTE parks the car and gets out. She looks around the front garden of a house frantically searching.)
LYNETTE: Boys? Boys? Boys?? If you’re hiding, you’ve gotta stop now cause Mommy doesn’t think it’s funny!
(A LADY comes out of the front door of the house LYNETTE is searching through.)
LYNETTE: Oh! Excuse me, I’m sorry, I’m looking for my boys. Three boys with red hair, have you seen ‘em?
LADY: Yeah, I also saw you drive away and leave ‘em.
LYNETTE: I know, I was just trying to scare them into behaving. Did you see where they went?
LADY: Yeah, yeah, they’re in my kitchen.
(LYNETTE puts a hand over her heart, relieved)
LADY: Listen, uh, it seems to me that you have some anger management issues.
LYNETTE: I have 4 kids under the age of six, I absolutely have anger management issues. (tries to go into the house as the woman stops her)
LADY: Yeah, well I think you need to talk to somebody, because abandoning your children…
LYNETTE: I-I-I didn’t abandon them, I came back! (tries to go into the house again, and the woman stops her)
LADY: Yeah, I’m just saying, it’s not normal.
LYNETTE: Well, my kids aren’t normal, and now I don’t have time for this, lady, so. Boys! Get out here. (tries to go into the house a third time as the woman stops her – again.)
LADY: No, I don’t think they should go anywhere until you calm down.
LYNETTE: Oh. Get in the car.
PARKER: She’s got cookies!
LYNETTE: Well, bring ‘em, we’re leaving.
LADY: Oh, no, no, no. Stay put.
LYNETTE: Oh, I don’t think so. Oh! (tries to go towards her kids as the woman grabs onto LYNETTE’s elbow, pulling her back)
LADY: Listen, lady, you and I are gonna talk.
PARKER: Leave my mommy alone!
LYNETTE: Let go of me! What’s the matter with you? (one of the kids bites the woman’s leg as another pushes her down onto the grass) Run, boys, run!
(LYNETTE and the kids run towards the car and get in.)
PORTER: Come on!
LYNETTE: Oh, crap.
LADY: (gets back up, running towards the SCAVO’s car) You get back here!
LYNETTE: Boys, you’re gonna need to put on your…(turns around as she sees all three boys putting on their seatbelts. She turns around, adjusting her glasses smugly.)
LADY: Get back, or I’m gonna call Social Services! (watches as the SCAVO’s drive off)
[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE -- DAY]
(GABRIELLE is sitting on the stairwell, looking at the one perfect rose sitting in a glass on the front foyer table. She hears a horn as she gets up and peers out the front door. She gasps as she walks out the door to see CARLOS standing next to a beautiful, sleek black sportscar with a huge red ribbon against the hood..)
GABRIELLE: Oh, my god. Carlos, what have you done?
CARLOS: I saw it when I drove by the dealership. I thought, Gabrielle would look so beautiful in this.
GABRIELLE: Carlos! (pushes him against the chest in excitement as he laughs, sorta evily.)
CARLOS: Cost me an arm and a leg. It’s got GPS navigation, 200-watt stereo system, rear parking sensors.
GABRIELLE: God, it’s beautiful!
CARLOS: So, did I take your breath away?
GABRIELLE: Absolutely!
CARLOS: Is it the best gift you’ve ever gotten?
NARRATOR: Gabrielle could see what this gesture had cost Carlos, so she responded the only way she knew how.
(GABRIELLE kisses CARLOS as he picks her up. She wraps her legs around his waist as he twirls her around, laughing together.)
NARRATOR: She had a feeling the truth would’ve been lost on her husband anyway. After all, it’s the rare man who understands the value of a single, perfect rose.
(We pan to across the street, where JOHN stands with a rake in his hands, looking desolate as he watches the SOLIS’ affectionately kissing and laughing together.)
[CUT TO: EXT. DELFINO HOUSE -- DAY --- AFTERNOON]
(SUSAN walks decidedly up the walkway and up the porch steps. She gasps as Bosco suddenly gets up from where he’s lying by the side of the porch, half-wagging his tail as he growls and barks at SUSAN. She sighs, startled as she rings the doorbell. MIKE opens the door, surprised to see her.)
MIKE: Susan.
SUSAN: I hope you don’t mind, I thought I’d come by early and help you set up.
MIKE: Oh, um.
(EDIE comes from inside the kitchen, coming to stand next to MIKE at the door.)
EDIE: Hey, Susan. Don’t worry, Mike and I have got everything under control.
SUSAN: Oh. (laughs)
MIKE: Bongo! I don’t know why he barks at you.
EDIE: Oh, I wouldn’t take it personally. Dogs are very sensitive. (goes to Bongo, patting him, rubbing him, looking at SUSAN innocently) What’s up, Bongo, huh? You never know what freaks them out, huh?
NARRATOR: In the distance, Susan thought she heard a bell ring.
EDIE: Oh, is it a strange noise, huh? What is it? A weird smell? What is it?
NARRATOR: (A bell sounds) Round one had started.
[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE’S OFFICE -- DAY]
(DR. GOLDFINE is listening as BREE sits on the couch next to REX, who’s talking animatedly.)
REX: Look, all I’m saying is that this whole it-takes-two-to-mess-up-a-marriage theory is bull. The problems that we have are because of her.
BREE: (crosses her arms) That is not true, Rex.
REX: Alright, fine. What have I been doing for the past 20 years that’s been so awful? You’re not saying anything because I’ve been a great husband and it kills you to admit that.
(DR. GOLDFINE looks down, fiddling with his newly-sewn button as REX talks.)
DR GOLDFINE: Rex, I’m curious. Do you ever acknowledge the benefits of living with Bree?
(BREE turns slowly to look at DR. GOLDFINE, beginning to see where this is going.)
REX: Huh?
DR GOLDFINE: By your own admission, your home is always clean, your clothes are always freshly pressed, sounds like a wonderful cook. Despite her flaws, do you ever remember to say thank you?
(A slow smile appears on BREE’s face as she looks at DR. GOLDFINE, silently thanking him for sticking up for her.)
REX: Thank you?
DR GOLDFINE: Yes. (moves his eyes towards BREE, who smiles and looks at REX, who just looks annoyed.)
[CUT TO: INT. DELFINO HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]
(MIKE, SUSAN, JULIE and EDIE are sitting at the table, eating. Bongo half-jumps onto the table to lick EDIE’s plate.)
MIKE: Bongo, Bongo, get down, down.
EDIE: Go on, uh-uh, go on.
MIKE: Down. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. (to SUSAN) So, um, who’s the guy who lives across from Mrs. Huber again?
SUSAN: Mm, that’s Mr. Mullin. And just so you know, if he invites you in, you have to meet all of his pets.
MIKE: That’s okay, I love animals.
SUSAN: He’s a taxidermist. (laughs)
MIKE: Oh. Okay, thanks for the warning.
EDIE: (is annoyed at the easy-going camaraderie between SUSAN and MIKE) Isn’t Mr. Mullin’s brother your divorce attorney?
SUSAN: Uh, yes, yes he was.
EDIE: Can I say something? In my heart, I still believe you and Carl are gonna get back together. (winks at JULIE, who looks amused, looking at SUSAN)
MIKE: Really?
EDIE: Oh, yeah. I’ve never seen two people more in love. I mean, she’s never gonna find that kind of chemistry with another man. Never!
(SUSAN smiles, head tilted away from MIKE as she runs a hand through her hair, forcibly smiling)
NARRATOR: It was everything Susan could do to keep a smile on her face. Round two was under way, and she was already taking a beating.
JULIE: You know what, Mrs. Britt, do you know who I always liked?
NARRATOR: What Edie hadn’t counted on was Susan had someone else in her corner.
JULIE: Mr. Rothwell. Your 4th husband.
EDIE: Oh, he was my 2nd husband. I’ve only been married twice.
JULIE: Twice? You weren’t married to the guy with all the tattoos that they took away in handcuffs?
SUSAN: No, Julie, she wasn’t married to Xavier. That was just one of her special friends. I think we should change the subject, you know, unless you wanna keep talking about it.
EDIE: (is happily distracted by Bongo jumping up to lick EDIE’s plate again) Oh!
MIKE: Bongo, get down.
EDIE: Oh wait, wait. Let me show you something. Bongo, Bongo, come! While you were in there tossing the salad, I taught him something. (holds a bit of food up in the air as Bongo jumps up on two feet, reaching for the food as he ‘walks’ around on two feet) Up! Oh, what a good boy!
(SUSAN shoots a glance at MIKE, who is watching EDIE and Bongo, laughing and smiling)
NARRATOR: Susan was furious at Edie for using a dog to ingratiate herself with its owner. She was also furious with Mike for not seeing through this blatant manoeuvre.
SUSAN: So, you know what? I am gonna go get dessert. (gathers the plates and walks into the kitchen)
NARRATOR: But mostly, she was furious at herself for not having thought of it first.
(SUSAN stacks the dirty dishes in the sink. She hears EDIE and MIKE’s conversation as they play with Bongo outside, furious.)
EDIE: You are such a smart boy!
MIKE: I can barely get him to sit.
EDIE: You are a good dog. Yes you are!
MIKE: (laughs) I’ve never seen him walk on two legs. Look at that!
EDIE: Well, he knows who to come to, doesn’t he? He knows who to come to.
(SUSAN dips two fingers into the gravy as she smears it across her neck and hands, grinning at her ‘brilliant’ idea. She comes back out again, holding three plates of strawberry shortcake. )
SUSAN: Here’s your dessert.
EDIE: Thank you. Mmm, Mike, this looks yummy.
(SUSAN moves her hand in front of Bongo’s face as Bongo licks SUSAN’s hand, then her neck as she bends down.)
MIKE: Oh, look at that. Looks like Bongo’s finally warming up to Susan.
(EDIE watches, furious as SUSAN laughs and giggles. MIKE watches, laughing as JULIE smiles.)
SUSAN: Ooh, we just got off on the wrong foot, we’re really best buddies now. Oh, what a good boy! (Bongo starts to wheeze, and SUSAN looks at him.) Bongo, are you okay?
EDIE: What’s wrong with him?
MIKE: I don’t know, I’ve never heard him make that sound. (gets up and bends down next to Bongo, who’s still wheezing.) Hey, you okay, fella?
JULIE: Mom? (gestures to SUSAN’s ear, where one earring is missing. Uh oh. SUSAN’s eyes go wide as she looks at MIKE, who just looks at her crossly.)
(Cut to: MIKE, holding Bongo as he hurries down his porch steps towards his truck. He puts Bongo on the back seat. EDIE, SUSAN and JULIE come out after him.)
MIKE: Call the vet, the numbers on the fridge, tell him I’ll be right there.
EDIE: Okay, don’t you worry ‘bout a thing, I’ll stay here and get everything cleaned up.
MIKE: Thanks, Edie.
SUSAN: Is there anything I can do?
MIKE: No.
(EDIE whistles lowly as she goes back inside, shutting the door. SUSAN stands there, looking helpless as MIKE’s truck screeches off. JULIE looks worriedly at SUSAN, who gnaws on her lower lip.)
[CUT TO: INT. VET’S OFFICE --- LATER]
(MIKE looks up as SUSAN walks into the office, accidentally shutting the door a little too loudly.)
SUSAN: Hey.
MIKE: Hey.
SUSAN: How’s Bongo doing?
MIKE: I’m, uh, just waiting to see if they’ll have to operate.
SUSAN: Oh, god. Uh, I… stopped and I got this, uh. I am just so sorry for this.
MIKE: I’m really sorry that I snapped at you, I was just so worried.
SUSAN: Oh no, it’s okay.
(The VET comes out of the inner office.)
VET: Good news, we won’t have to do surgery.
SUSAN: Oh, that’s great.
VET: Uh, we’ve given Bongo something to help pass the earring. When he does, would you like us to retrieve it for ya?
SUSAN: Uh, I’m gonna say no.
VET: Okay, you should be able to take him home within an hour.
SUSAN: Wow. You must be so relieved.
MIKE: I’m sorry, I was just really worried.
SUSAN: Well, it was your dog, I get it.
MIKE: Actually, he was my wife’s dog, and, uh, one of the last things she said to me in the hospital before she died was to be sure I looked after him, and, um, I promised her I would.
NARRATOR: And just like that, Susan could suddenly see something she’d never seen before.
MIKE: He, um, meant so much to her.
NARRATOR: Mike Delfino was still in love with his late wife.
MIKE: And if, uh, something had happened, I would’ve felt like I had failed her. I know that sounds stupid.
NARRATOR: And she knew right then, that neither she nor Edie would be laying claim to his heart anytime soon.
SUSAN: No it doesn’t. Not at all.
NARRATOR: So, she decided, for now, she could settle for just being his friend.
SUSAN: This is for you. No, for Bongo. You give it to him.
[CUT TO: INT. DELFINO HOUSE --- LATER]
(EDIE is in the kitchen, still cleaning up as she bustles around the kitchen. She opens the cupboard to put a few bottles of condiments back in, just missing seeing stacks of cash on the cupboard shelf. The camera pans up to see a few maps stuck to the wall, marked with many drawings and markings. We also see a gun sitting on the shelf above, as well as a very detailed map of Wisteria Lane and information about its many residents.)
NARRATOR: Yes, as I look back at the world I left behind, it’s all so clear to me. The beauty that waits to be unveiled, the mysteries that long to be uncovered. But, people so rarely stop to take a look. They just keep moving. It’s a shame, really. There’s so much to see.
(The camera pans back down to the wilderness, where somewhere in the depths of the forest, the mysterious chest PAUL dumped into the river floats back up the surface.)
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